First Sleep Over

 

Last Friday Ava went on her first sleep over. Since her birth she has never stayed the night away from both Ryan and I so this was a big milestone for us. I was hoping to plan a few over-nights for her before baby brother's birth will have us away at the hospital for a few days. The destination was Aunt Amy's, grandma also came to join the fun. The week before she asked me every day if it was the day she was getting to have her sleep over.  She was so excited when Friday finally came. She eagerly helped me pack her suitcase. I had our church's ladies retreat that night. We both had lots of fun at our sleep overs and stayed up way past our bed times. We enjoyed long naps the next day. First sleep over is in the books. 

snow!

Last week we enjoyed a less than 24 hour blanket of snow. I came home from work a little early as I wanted to take Ava out in it before it got dark. My work week from the week before was a doozy, I was held up everyday for end of day crisis' that staff needed assistance with. So as I watched the snow accumulate from my office window I knew I wanted to redeem some of those longer work days away from her with some memorable snow moments. 

 

I love working with the team I do that supports me in the way they do. That fact that I get to work a part time option while continuing to advance in leadership there is unique and I know a true blessing that I do not take for granted. I could predict my boss' response, who has this great ability to inspire you to perform your best by supporting/valuing you as a whole person. In our line of work as in many lines of work you can't really separate the two. You are the tool you use to do the work you do. Your growth as a professional is intertwined with your growth as a person. If you empty yourself in either role without filling yourself back up, you can't bring the best of you to those roles. So I got the big thumbs up, of course, go be with your girl, we are good from here from her and the other management team member that were holding down the fort that day. The message always being we take turns holding the fort and I love fort holding with the team I do.

 

We spent more time bundling and unbundling then we did in the snow. After a few snow balls thrown, a few laughs shared as we leaned heads back sticking our tongues out to catch the giant snow flakes and a few moments enjoying our crunchy boot sounds as we trecked around the back yard, she told me it was cold and we should go back inside.  Fair enough. It was still exactly what I hoped it would be, I'll show her the pictures, she won't probably have a clear memory of that day but like so many other my-heart-is-full mommy moments this will be tucked away and treasured for me for some time to come. My grandmother says that memories are one of God's greatest blessings, we can take the best moments and re-visit them again and again. I would very much have to agree.

 



 



These days

Oh Ava, there are several things I've been cataloging for documenting in a "these days" blog update. Some of them sweet and some of them ornery and many in between, which perfectly describes this season with you. Here goes...

 

To start with the ornery this weekend, we were playing nap time. I love playing this during this stage of pregnancy, you put me to bed in your bed, sing me songs, say prayers, etc. You find so much joy in my just laying there and letting you be in charge and I find so much joy in just laying there. After you were gone for literally 2 minutes, I got up from my "nap" to see what you were doing. I found you in the kitchen, you immediately put the sharpie marker down to your side and just kept saying "Hi Mommy" with a nervous laugh/smile. I found you "decorated" one of my favorite pillows and one of your oven mittens. This sharpie wasn't even out, you went to our kitchen drawer and got it out. We talked about what markers are yours and what Markers are mommy's and that we only use markers on paper. 

 

 

 

You love to get dinner or lunch prepared for your babies, you work in your kitchen and have them eat at our table. You like to do this with one baby on your hip while the others are seated and "buckled" in thier chairs at thte table.

 

You now have an invisible friend "Benny" thats been around a lot this week. His is very new on the scene. He goes with us places. One day you didn't want to take a bath, it shocked me when all I had to do to get you to change your mind was tell you Benny could take one too with you. I notice Benny is often up to something. Sometimes you like to say "Ewe Benny!" When I aske what Benny's doing he has usually brought in a snake or a spider and might try to put either on our head?

 

You talk alot about baby brother now. You still really want us to name him "Taco". There's a dog named taco in one of your recent favorite library books.

 

We are in the stage that you want to be firecely indpendent at times. I try to side step many power struggles with you throughout the day, sometimes I do better at than others. I try to find that balance of teaching you obedience and letting you excercise your indpendence in appropriate ways. I was reminded again at a recent training that they main developmental attachment tasks of year one is "who can I trust?" the main task for year 2-5 is "who's the boss?". You have to tackle the first one before you can move to the second one. I think we can celebrate that you have task one down because you are well on the journey for the next one!



First Date

He got a haircut and she painted her nails.

It was her first date.

 

I love that while no dress code was requested or required, he wore a suit to mark the occasion. 

 

 

I will have to remind her in the later years, no kissing on first dates.
Although if I do recall her father kissed me on our first date as well .

 

Thanks Danielle and Katie for putting together and documenting for us such a fun and memorable night!



2nd time around

 

The 2nd time around has a few differences from the first time around for me. My goal now this pregnancy is to get a picture at least with each trimester- which is a bit of a contrast to the weekly pictures of the first time around. (Next week starts third trimester, squeezed a belly shot just in time for the 2nd tri-mester) I feel more relaxed and layed back this time around. Its nice that we have all the baby necessities and amenities from first time around there's only a few small things I hope to get before he gets here. No pressure on getting registered and no lost feeling of being really unsure of what actually need or don't need to be ready for baby.

 

A few things are the same, still no name just yet even as we enter this third tri-mester. Love this second tri-mester again this time, I am sleeping great and not experiencing too many problem symptoms at this stage. I can also feel that slow shift again from loving the idea of baby but being glad we have more prep time to moving towards the desire to hold him and know him.

 

27 weeks

Our Saturday...

Well we survived January, I had a lot of trainings and extra work hours. We also did a few house preps for the kids (that's fun and weird to say "the kids") bedrooms, hopefully I will post soon on those. We also had a storm shelter installed. So that to say the busy month left little time for updating the blog, hopefully February will find a slightly slower pace.

 

Tonight Ryan and Ava had a daddy daughter date night at church. I realized I think this was the first night since her birth that I enjoyed an evening home alone, with no where to go and nothing to do. I lived it up for course, watching a movie and then read a good book during a long uninterrupted bath. During this season of life I have to say it was a pretty enjoyable way to spend a Saturday night.  



Ava dressed and ready for date night.  

A little pre-date surprise in the sky?



Hot air balloons circling our neighborhood!

 

 Is there anything better than the mind of the two year old? At times nothing seems impossible, she was sure if she ran fast enough and reached high enough she could touch one.

 







 I was in a training this week and have been doing more reading recently on the effects of early trauma on a developing brain. It's been fascinating, disturbing and hopeful all at the same time. I have to say its hard for me thinking about maltreatment, abuse and neglect of children Ava's age. Of course its always been hard to truly connect too but more so now as a mother. Sometimes I can't help but think while I am in my warm, safe home, wrapped in the love of my little family, I think about the many somewheres out there at that same moment that there are little ones, vulnerable ones, who are not so safe and not so cared for. I can only offer a prayer in that moment when it all seems so big and so defeating. I know its strange that while I'm not thinking about any of them specifically somehow I hope thinking of them makes them less alone and less forgotten. I love the work I do because usually I get to connect with those on the healing side of that journey.  I try to lean on the hopeful message that the brain has remarkable capacity for recovery given the right conditions with the right relationships, over the right amount of time. God truly designed a remarkable piece of us that protects us and can help heal us too. So learning even more about the science behind the developing brain has me watching Ava with new curiosity and understanding this week. I loved watching Ava's wonder and delight of the hot air balloons. I loved thinking about all those sweet dads out for a night with their daughters, cherishing them in and nurturing relationships with them. and for those moments when Ava's toddler brain leaves me feeling frustrated and impatient I pray I can connect with the understanding of how her mind was designed to develop and that God has entrusted me with no greater task then to nurture and help it grow in a way that honors Him and the path he has prepared for her.

2012 in Review...

Just finished my yearly review of all my posts for the last year, so fun to remember things and with details that I would of forgot otherwise. As I reviewed my goals I set for last year I accomplished all but one which feels pretty successful, excited to iron out my goals for 2013! But first a recap of the the big events for our little family for 2012.

The big 12 in 2012:

1. A major goal accomplished, completed my first 10K and then my first Half Marathon! It felt so big and daunting that goal at this point last year. But it feels so satisfying now to know it was accomplished and the journey it was to get there.
2. AM and I survived two toddlers in the big city of Chicago when I went to a training there in the spring. We have some awesome memories of our times together, be they the best of times or the worst, we wouldn't trade any of it.
3. Ava turned 2. We celebrated with an elephant themed family party at our house.
4. We went on the best vacation to date! Stayed in a beach house at Rosemary beach for an entire week. Ava experienced her first boat ride and we all had our first wild dolphin encounter.
5. We celebrated the birth of a new niece/cousin, Adley Lynn. We traveled to Texas to meet her, Ava's been quite taken with her from day one.
6. Ava stayed up for her first firework fourth. We went downtown and had lots of fun.
7. Aunt Amy, Ava and I went on our annual visit to Houston! We had fun as usual despite the crazy heat.
8. Ryan turned 30!
9. Ryan was promoted at work. I still think "controller" is a pretty funny name for a work position. I am thankful 2012 was another year we both are doing the kind of work we want to be doing and work with great people and continue with company's that have been very good to us.
10. This fall Ava tackled some big girl milestones, she said goodbye to the Paci and became potty trained!
11. We said goodbye to Mema and laid her to rest. December was a hard month in many ways, I found myself deeply saddened by the national events of the school shooting in Connecticut both as a mother of a young child and as a trauma therapist that works with kids and schools. It was a very tearful month. Goodbyes can be good and they can be so very hard. It was a month that brough me back to center... "this world is not our home, we are just a passing through". Time here is precious and limited, be it 90 years or 6 years may we love fiercely and live our purpose fully.
12.  The circle continues, We found out we are pregnant and expecting a baby boy!

When I see the year as a whole I am so thankful for all the blessings of this past year. It was a good year around here, Goodbye 2012! While you are done the best of you will not be forgotten.