I try always keep my posts honest and for my own process I chose to usually focus on things I am grateful for and blessings in my life. But here's an even extra dose of honesty for a post tonight...ready for it, its not earth shattering and its not new but here's the realization I think I've tried to fight off since becoming a mom, sometimes being a parent is overwhelming. The overwhelming part is that I'm not just a parent, like all the other moms out there I have many other roles that are part of who I am. The short list right now besides mother is wife, supervisor, clinician, bible class teacher, friend, sister, daughter, aunt, granddaughter...all roles I cherish and I find meaning and purpose in. Sometimes parenting can be consuming and then I can't give to other roles what they might need or what I use to be able to do. The journey of parenthood has brought many moments of pure joy, fulfillment, happiness and wonderment like I've never experienced before but its also brought worry, fear, doubt and feelings of overwhelmedness (if thats a word) like I've never experienced before. The answer is the answer I've ran across before but a lesson I keep learning: let go and let God. Trust him and do my best with every day keeping the priorities in mind he has set up for me. He wants me to serve my family first and others come next and along the way he also wants me to be kind to myself. So for all the things that feel undone right now as I look around at a messy house and a donting to do list...I have to tell myself Its okay and when it feels like too much there's value in just being still and knowing that He is God.
4 comments:
I think you are so right. When I was wrestling with deciding about changing Dr's a friend said- You are already a parent now and part of being a parent is having to make choices with your child in mind and make tough choices that might be uncomfortable for you. I think that is a lesson about parenting we will have to learn again and again as we juggle balancing the many roles. And hopefully along with that we will grow in being still with God. I figure the mess and to-dos will still be there but the days when they are little will fly by. *Please remind me of this when I am overwhelmed and crying about my piled up laundry and messy house in a few months! :)
Amen! I'm such a people please it's REALLY hard for me to say "no" when someone asks me to do something or help with something but I'm slowly learning that it's not good for anyone for me to be overwhelmed so I just need to prioritize and not beat myself up if I can't do something.It's a tough lesson to learn though and I'm still not good at it!
I must say that you are still doing a good job at your non-mommy roles, too, even long distance! Your insight to me this week on some issues I've been struggling with lately was most timely and made my week a whole lot better. I really believe you were a tool God used to speak some words I needed to hear this week to regain a realistic perspective. Thanks for that. Also, I love a quote my friend shares that her mom taught her--our kids need for us NOT to be perfect. They need to see us fail and they need to know that we can never be "enough." That leaves room for them to need a Savior. If we met every need our kids had, there would be no need for Jesus. I have begun to even translate that to my own life. Every day I see yet another reason I need a saving, forgiving God.
And...I am glad to know you were honest in admitting that being a mommy is tough...sometimes I need some allies. :)
thanks for the support guys! Daicia, I love that qoute from your friend! so insightful! So nice to share this journey with fellow sisters in christ.
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