The hair cut heard around the world...

Okay the title may be a little dramatic and I am in a different place with it all now then when it first went down but for sure want to document this event in our little world this spring.

Ava's main adjustment with the addition of baby brother has been in the form of mischievous shenanigans. When I'm feeding brother Ava used this time of new found freedom to get into all sorts of things. These have included "cleaning her furniture" by pouring cups of water over the top of them, sharpie marker on her play room furniture, an entire roll of toilet paper in the toilet and the biggest of all, her first hair cut(s).

Ava was playing in her play room upstairs, which had not yet been a problem, she came down to show me something else, I saw her coming down the stairs and it took me a minute to realize what was off, I immediately become tearful, I could not stop crying, I end up calling Ryan and of course my first words since this was the first he had ever received a sobbing phone call from me was "we are okay but Ava cut her hair a lot and I can't quit crying".  Ryan of course was the soft voice of calm assurance and sanity. We texted him a picture and planned to met at the kids hair cut place that afternoon. Their expertise in handling these situations was much appreciated, the final product of course is cute on her and I think we've all recovered since then.

I've reflected a lot on this uncharacteristic response from myself, as I feel I am usually calm, level headed and it takes a lot to work me up into that kind of emotional response. I've decided one part of this equation I am sure was hormones/sleep deprivation but they other was change overload. I have a love/hate relationship with change. Even good change brings loss of different kinds and adjusting to new challenges. This was a culminating moment for me of feeling like I can't be there and juggle it all in the way I could before. Some days with two seem so very manageable and then there are moments when it is so very overwhelming. I am still finding my footing and learning this new role in mom of two. A technique I love to use with clients is the best friend approach. What would you tell your best friend about this situation and find ways to embrace that message to yourself. This is especially helpful in the motherhood department as we can be so hard on ourselves for ways we feel we are falling short.

We've been shenanigan free for a couple weeks now. Ava asks me many days when will her hair be long again? Her little bob makes hair washing and brushing a breeze and is of course cool for summer. I said goodbye literally to a little more to the baby part of my little girl as those baby hairs fell to the the floor. It wasn't the most graceful goodbye on my part but hey we mom's are people too.The last few weeks of storms and continued trauma in communities in our area gave renewed perspective on many things for me and one of those in even this smallest of ways was to reinforce what I was trying embrace but hadn't fully yet... it is just hair. What a blessing it is to get to say many hellos and goodbyes as we reach new stages on this parenthood journey. How easy it is to take that for granted.  I've been so thankful many times in the past two weeks to kiss the top of that little bobed head thats safely by my side. I pray I can live with a grateful heart for the daily blessing of getting to be their mom - shenanigans and all.